For many Australians living with autism or a learning disability and trying to maintain a social life can not only be a challenge, but it can also be daunting. Gig Buddies is a not-for-profit organisation that is tackling the isolation of this demographic.
They’ve put a call out for volunteers on the Northern Beaches, and as of now, the service has three ‘buddies’ ready to make a friend for life.
Specific details of the buddies are revealed during the volunteer application process, but people who are interested in volunteering can check the Gig Buddies website to see if their personalities align.
For some real-life case studies, Manly Observer visited three volunteers and their buddies at the Harbord Hotel to see just how strong a bond can form between a duo who were complete strangers before the program. As you’ll read further down, it made a world of difference for everyone involved.
On our arrival, the group sat around a table by the pub’s entrance anxiously waiting, burdened by the knowledge that a video interview was in their near future. It was unfamiliar territory, but so was stepping outside their comfort zone when originally joining the program. And so, they were equally eager to share their positive experiences hoping to influence more volunteers to come forward.
First up was volunteer Fergus and his buddy Ben. The dynamic duo have been together for over a year and are two peas in a pod, and not just figuratively, as they had no problem squishing together in a booth to cater for the iPhone portrait film dimensions.
“What they always try is to match people up based on hobbies and interests. And I could see that they did that really well with pairing me with Fergus. From the moment we met, we clicked,” Ben said, happily reminiscing on their match-up.
“Ben and I really clicked that very first day back whenever it was. We have a shared passion for cars,” Fergus added.
Ben is employed at car dealership Col Crawford in Brookvale, a terribly kept secret as he donned his uniform proudly, trumped only by his obvious love for cars as he shared a picture of his beloved BMW on his phone lock screen within five minutes of the meeting.
Fergus moved to Australia from Ireland five years ago and admits none of his new friends down under expressed his mutual interest in cars. The program has provided the two with a much-needed outlet to discuss their common interest.
But relationships are not only about mutual interests, they also entail an element of sharing personal ones too. Fergus let Ben know about the Irish delicacy of a Guinness, which has now become his favourite beer with the two often catching up for a pint to spill some tea over a brew. Ben returned the favour of introducing Fergus to the hilarious world of comedy clubs.
“Ben, your passion for comedy, unbeknownst to yourself, I haven’t gone to very many comedy gigs in all my time, and there’s something that has kind of become a bit of a highlight of my tenure in Australia, going to these comedy gigs. You dragged me out of my comfort zone to do that,” Fergus shared.
“Before I met Fergus, I’d never had a pint of Guinness in my life, which is surprising, which is amazing, like, given the Irish heritage,” Ben said, gesturing to his ginger hair.
“Now it’s my favourite beer. As for comedy, I always like having a bit of a laugh and having someone to share it with. That’s what’s more important than the actual event itself.”
Ben joined Gig Buddies five years ago when his mum suggested the program to meet people. He is neurodiverse and had trouble making friends. Similarly, Fergus had trouble meeting people when he first came to Australia calling himself “a fish in a different pond”. Their mutual understanding of each other and shared interests made them a perfect match.
Next up were Michelle and her buddy Dylan. Their relationship was fairly new – just over seven months – but they’d already formed a chemistry. But it wasn’t science puns which had the two giggling for most of the interview, rather Seinfeld reruns.
“We’ve got a lot of the same interests. We laugh a lot. We love Seinfeld,” Michelle explained.
The two said aloud their favourite Seinfeld character on the count of three shortly after. Michelle laughingly proclaimed she knew Dylan would choose Kramer, while Dylan seemed surprised that Michelle went for George. He then attributed his similarities to not only George but all the characters.
“I’m mostly related to George. I’m funny as Seinfeld, and I’m tall as Kramer,” he said.
“As clumsy as Kramer,” Michelle interjected.
“And a bit witty as Elaine,” he finished.
The pair joined up to make some positive, lasting connections, but also to have some fun, which they do.
When they meet up, they don’t just binge and “eat burgers”, not to say that’s not a priority on their to-do list, they also do a range of activities from axe throwing to the Manly game to musical bingo.
“We’ve done some things like axe throwing, like actual axes,” Dylan boasted.
“That’s dangerous,” Michelle said snidely.
“Dangerous, if you don’t know what you’re doing,” he humorously concluded.
It was clear, in the short time they’d known one another, their friendship had already formed, with there rarely being a time when the pair weren’t jesting with one another.
“I love it so much because Dylan makes me laugh a lot, and I deal with so many people every day, but Dylan brings me way more joy than I bring him,” said Michelle.
“I just want you to be my friend. I don’t look at it like volunteering. You’re a part of my life.”
“Me too, same,” Dylan agreed. “Enjoy what you’re doing, yeah, live your life.”
Last but certainly not least, Mark and his veteran buddy of three years, Harry, arrived a little late to the interview. Harry works a meaningful job, helping out as a groundskeeper at St Augustine’s College. One didn’t have to be an old boy to know this as, like Ben, he wore his uniform proudly on display.
The two got on like old friends, and they were, with Harry not hesitating to put on his best English accent to mimic Mark when describing one of his favourite things about him.
“He’s a good laugh, aren’t you, mate?” Mark rhetorically questioned Harry with a grin. “Like, he’s good fun. I just love his positivity. Harry just loves everything.”
“I love being with Gig Buddies, and having Mark Powell with me is a great experience,” Harry retorted.
“Aw, thanks mate,” added Harry.
The two share a passion for sports. Their outings will usually involve something active like lawn bowls or ten-pin bowling. But a first choice of outing will be attending whatever sporting event is on at the time, AFL, NRL, Cricket. Although the last one can prove controversial during an Ashes test, as Mark admits his favourite player is Freddie Flintoff while Harry’s is Brett Lee.
Nevertheless, the two manage to have a great time.
“I got videos of Harry dancing in the stands, shouting. I think you’re the loudest person in the SCG,” Mark said to a fist-pumping Harry.
Mark joined Gig Buddies after having some spare evenings and hearing about the program from friends who are volunteers. He has loved his time in Australia ever since arriving and saw this as a great opportunity to give back. It’s obvious the Brit gladly got more than he bargained for, gaining a lifelong friend, as it was equally clear that so did Harry.
“I feel more happier, I feel more happier,” Harry emphasised.
Gig Buddies is live all across Sydney and pairs volunteers not just based on personality but age, gender and location preferences.
The Northern Beaches candidates have a variety of interests that can appeal to any person. One member is looking for someone who shares their passion for sailing, music and pubs, preferably in the 40-60 age range. Another loves being outdoors as much as they love musicals with a preferred age range of 20-40. While the other is looking for an active, 30-40-year-old male who enjoys the beach, running and music.
The program requires volunteers to meet with their buddies at least once a month and participate in activities such as sporting matches, music concerts, or simply catching up for a coffee or a beer.
As Manly Observer wrapped up their interview with each Gig Buddy and their volunteer, the participants returned to the shared table at the Harbord Hotel and jumped straight into conversation. Harry and Mark were once again exchanging words like old pals, one wouldn’t dare interrupt the immense conversation between Ben and Fergus who were a Guinness away from moving on to their next venue and Dylan and Michelle were purchasing tickets to a Metallica concert.
Not Michelle’s go-to cup of tea, but she was willing to try the experience for Dylan who was showing off his best head-banging.
Each Gig Buddy shared they have become more confident than before they started the program. It’s clear it works. And from sitting at the end of the table, watching everyone engage in meaningful chats, it’s clear they are far happier having met the other who is now a part of their life. So why not join the club?
More info here